Details for Monday, December 10, 2007

My alarm went off at 6:45 this morning. I was unwilling to wake up because I was still tired, my bed was warm, and the cat hadn't started begging for food yet. I got up at about 7 a.m. and felt like I was getting a cold or had allergies. I'm still not sure which is the case but either way it's not enjoyable. I took a shower and picked out an outfit. I settled on a nice, new suit that I just picked up from the dry cleaner on Friday. I blew dry my hair and left it straight (as opposed to putting it in curlers, which I do about half the time). I had already packed my lunch and my bag for work the night before, so the morning was not too hectic. Oh yeah, I did feed the cat. I walked out the door at 8:10 and caught the 8:18 light rail train bound for downtown. The light rail is about 2.5 blocks from my house. Train takes 6 minutes to reach my destination. I got off the train and went to La Bou for a bagel. I was starving. Although the scale told me this morning that I weighed about 4 lbs more than I want to, I still felt the need to eat a high-calorie, high-carb breakfast. Go figure. The office is about one block from La Bou and the train stop. Very convenient. I get into the office and see two huge platters of Noah's Bagels. Yum! How exciting. Even though I had a bagel already. Noah's is of much better quality than La Bou. I ate half a cinnamon-sugar bagel from Noah's (messy!) and then still ate the bagel I got. I also bought some chocolate mocha mix from Safeway yesterday, and I had two mugs of that. I spent quite a bit of time checking emails and doing personal work but now it's 11:18 a.m. and I have done some substantive work. I am leaving in about an hour to go home and get my car and drive to Oakland for a meeting. Afterward I plan to do some Christmas shopping for family members. So far, whenever I've attempted to shop for others, I only buy things for myself. That has to change. I'll have to continue this later. Need to call my boss and complete any preparation work to get ready for the meeting this afternoon. I also need to fill out my expense report for last month so I can get my reimbursement check.

(continued...) I went home and scarfed down some lunch, then drove to Oakland. I ran into some knarly traffic in Vacaville and thought I'd be late for the meeting, but luckily I arrived about 15 minutes early and everything worked out perfectly. Meeting went well. Afterward, went to get coffee with my boss and we discussed office gossip. My plan was to do some Xmas shopping. I stayed in Oakland and bought a gift (soup cookbook) for my mom. Then I headed for Walnut Creek but got a little lost in downtown Oakland, trying to find the 24 freeway. I called my friend Krista, who got online and helped steer me in the right direction. I went to Walnut Creek, which has a really beautiful downtown shopping area. It's especially nice this time of year, because the street are lined with trees, decorated with white lights. I was able to do some shopping for people other than myself, which was my goal. I left Walnut Creek, but first got lost trying to find the freeway. Of course. I figured it out on my own fairly quickly and wanted to be back home by 9:30 so I could watch one of my favorite shows, Notes from the Underbelly. I got in at about 9:35, so not bad. I watched the show, had some dinner (and ice cream), fed the cat, changed into pajamas, and was in bed by about 10:30. Pretty busy and long day, but mostly spent in transit, driving and stuck in traffic. At least I wasn't at my desk all day.

I love this song!!

Everything's Magic...by Angels and Airwaves

And do you ever feel like you're alone?
And do you ever wish to be unknown?
I could say that I have..
I could say that I have..
And do you ever feel things here aren't right?
And do you ever feel the time slip by?
I can say that I have..
And I can say that I have..

So hear this please
And watch as your heart speeds up endlessly
And look for the stars as the sun goes down
Each breath that you take has a thunderous sound
Everything, everything's magic
Just sit back and hold on, but hold on tight
Prepare for the best and the fastest ride
And reach out your hand, and i'll make you mine
Everything, everything's magic

And do you ever lay awake at night?
And do you ever tell yourself don't try?
Don't try to let yourself downDon't try to let yourself down
And do you ever see yourself in love?
And do you ever take a chance, my love?
Because you know that I will..Because you know that I will..

So hear this please
And watch as your hearts speeds up endlessly
And look for the stars as the sun goes down
Each breath that you take has a thunderous sound
Everything, everything's magic
Just sit back and hold on, but hold on tight
Prepare for the best and the fastest ride
And reach out your hand, and i'll make you mine
Everything, everything's magic
Everything, everything's magic

So hear this please
And watch as your hearts speeds up endlessly
And look for the stars as the sun goes down
Each breath that you take has a thunderous sound
Everything, everything's magic
Just sit back and hold on, but hold on tight
Prepare for the best and the fastest ride
And reach out your hand, and I'll make you mine
Everything, everything's magic

LOVE it!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1bFvDAng3sA

Moving ON!

So, I had three dates over the weekend. With three different guys. None of whom are 40-year old stoners. Yay!

A few helpful rules for men

“Casual” Dating 101

When you are NOT looking to get into a relationship…

DO NOT

say “you’ve met me at the perfect time. I’m emotionally and mentally available.”
introduce her to your son
leave a bunch of your stuff over at her apartment
make future plans with her
spend tons of time with her and stay over at her place a lot


Why? Because if you do these things, you risk misleading her into thinking you want something more serious.

DO

indicate to her that you are dating others
let her know you are not ready to get into a relationship
be honest!


Other, general dating DON’Ts

Hypothetical Situation: the girl you are dating helps to arrange for you to be the featured artist at a weekend exhibit. The event takes place in a venue where you and the girl spent time together on the first night you met. One of the girl’s best friends works at the venue. Unfortunately, neither the girl nor her friend can attend, as they are both out of town that weekend.

At this event:

Do NOT, under any circumstances, pick up on the co-worker of the good friend of the girl you are dating.

[Also, as an aside, do not pick up on ANY of the girl’s friends. This should be common sense, but sadly, sometimes is not. Especially when alcohol is involved.]

Do NOT make out in public places with the co-worker of the girl’s good friend.

Do not bring presents to the co-worker in her place of work (remember, the girl’s good friend ALSO works there).

Most of all, do NOT invite the co-worker to come over and spend the night at your house the night before you and the girl are going on a weekend trip together.

Summary: IF you choose to date several women at once, make sure they DO NOT know each other. Remember, Sacramento is a small town!

Room for Rent, Prefer Young College-Aged Female

Check out the creepy craigslist posting he submitted to try to find a roommate for the new house he is planning to move into:

I'm an artist and single father of a 9 year old boy, living in a large 3&2 with big front & back yards. I've moved in to increase my painting space - I'm using the garage... Though, it is a bit too expensive for me - so I'm looking for a short or long term renter to help out. I'd prefer a female student athlete or otherwise pro-active female(good example of a woman for my son)... FYI, I work for the Sacramento Convention & Visitors Bureau, and Maloof Sports & Entertainment. Holla! Let's chat... 916-549-2749.

Things he neglected to mention:
1) he is 40 yrs old
2) he smokes pot constantly
3) he will paint in the house, NOT in the garage
4) he has a thing for much younger women
5) he is totally messy and has really old, ugly and gross furniture, not to mention that his artwork, of varying quality, will be displayed on every wall of the house
6) I'm suprised he didn't say "I'm 6'5", a former model and actor, tan, physically fit, I play soccer and go kayaking, I cook sushi and like to give massages..."

This is too good not to post on the blog

Background: I decided I really needed to get rid of the artist guy. I thought I could keep him around, but ultimately it wasn't working for me. Plus, I knew that he wasn't feeling it anymore either. I asked him if we could meet and he tried to put me off till next week. I said fine, then I changed my mind and sent him an email asking if we could meet sooner and that I was annoyed he was not making an effort. I said I had a number of things on my mind and needed to talk with him. This is what he wrote back!

Hi Michele, I feel ya! Please forgive me..."It's not you! It's me!" (How 'bout that for a classically over used generic blah!):-( ...I have a broken heart and I can't seem to get it healthy again... When I first met you - I was trying really hard not to focus on "it", but rather I was trying to forget and just move on... You stunned me. 'So, beautiful and smart and interested in who I was. You are awesome! Though, quickly the haunting returned and I tried to ignore it, but I failed. Now I am beating myself up and hiding myself as not to bother others with my self-pitiful dronings... I have NEVER felt such heart ache for soooo long. Maybe it's 'cause my mom isn't around to coo and tell me what I need to hear. I feel crazy blaming "hate"... then waves of "love"... then cascading self-doubt... then illogical hope.... then self-blame... and some where along the way, I remember life is sooo awesome! And that my son is depending on me to show him Love and teach him how to heal and be pro-active. Bottom line is that I feel a little "crazy" these daze, and helplessly heart broken. Please forgive me... I thought I could "move on"...You are awesome. 'Truly a class act! You are fun, smart, sexy,adventurous, generous, grateful, humble, loyal, trust worthy, I could go on & on... :-) I've already gone through 5 tissues at this point... So, I'd better get back to work before folk start noticing! Plus, I've got a 11:30am in Folsom - doh! Gotta go!!! Michele, I am sorry to confuse and frustrate you. You are super to me...Love bless - b

Infidelity

Lately it seems like I keep encountering examples of real-life infidelity everywhere. Has it become so common to be unfaithful that it’s become acceptable, sometimes even expected? What are the incentives for staying loyal? Are people in relationships so insecure that they need to constantly seek outside approval to prove to themselves that they are still desirable? Never having been in a really serious or committed relationship, I’m not personally familiar with the monotony of being with the same person for a number of years. From what people tell me, marriage or other long-term relationships go through cycles and periods of ups and downs. Realizing this and having the patience to wait out the not-so-good times is what makes a lot of relationships work. I think Americans have this incredibly romantic ideal of love that is also unrealistic in the long run. Extramarital affairs of political figures and celebrities are splashed everywhere in the news, making infidelity much more public than it was in the past. Perhaps people have always been as disloyal as they are now, but it’s more acceptable to discuss now? I’m not sure. I have friends who are involved with married men. I know a woman who has been having an affair with a married man for years and years. I just heard about a woman who is 50, never married, who is involved with a married man. I have dated a lot of guys who’ve been cheated on by girlfriends and wives. My friend’s aunt and uncle, who’ve been married for 25 + years and have two grown children, recently split because he was having an affair with his young secretary. Cliché, but true. Another friend told me that at least three of the guys he works with cheat on their wives. One is supposedly “reformed.” A gay friend told a story of running into a guy he’d been intimate with. He said hello to him and the guy gave him the death stare. My friend quickly realized that the guy was with his wife. Oops. So, what is the point of my observations? Just another reason to avoid marriage. I feel, what’s the point? If it’s so acceptable to cheat, if loyalty is a value that people just don’t possess. What’s the incentive for staying true to one person? A lot of men have told me that the only reason to get married is if you want kids. That is not a very appealing thought – that guys get married just to have kids. Because, you can still be a parent and love your children while cheating on your spouse. In this day and age, cheating is a serious health concern too. STDs are incredibly common. It seems like people who cheat have a variety of excuses for why they do so. The people they cheat with, who are also committing adultery, also have a litany of excuses that make them feel OK about what they’re doing, who they’re hurting. Do they believe their own excuses?