Confessions of a Slacker

I confess, I’ve been a total slacker the last couple of weeks at work. I plan on picking up the pace next week, because I’ve learned that NOT working actually makes the day go by much slower, and I feel much more sluggish at the end of the day. Not worth it! Plus I feel a little guilty too. How have I been keeping myself occupied? Well, I spend a lot of time job-searching. I used to feel uncomfortable using state time and computers to search for other jobs, but now I can justify it, because I feel very uncertain about my future employment situation.

Today I took it a step further and actually applied for a job online. It probably took me about half an hour, so I called it my lunch break. I find very few jobs that I actually want to apply for, and I think this is the only job I’ve applied for. It’s something in Sacramento, in the private sector. Not my ideal job, but according to the description, it appeared to be something I’d be at least relatively qualified for. I have no idea what the salary would be. I mostly applied in the hopes I’ll get called for an interview, because I think it will be good practice to do some job interviews. It’s a fairly large corporation, and I imagine they’ll get a lot of applications for this position, so I don’t have high expectations that I’ll be considered. If I really wanted to pursue it, I could probably call a couple of people who could put in a good word. But I am not going to that length, I suppose I’m not that desperate yet.

The other thing I’ve been doing while I’m supposed to be working is studying for this horrendous exam required for those who wish to serve the US as diplomats. I took the exam yesterday afternoon and would be shocked if I actually passed. Most disappointing was that I spent what I consider to be a great deal of time studying and preparing. The questions I thought were difficult were on topics I feel to be rather obscure. I thought to myself during the test, there’s no way I could have studied more and done better. I did my best, and made a number of educated guesses, but my sense is that I missed too many to get a passing score.

The exam has four sections: job knowledge, which is the part that I found most difficult. The questions test your knowledge of US and world history, culture, world geography, the political system, etc. The next section was an opportunity to answer questions about yourself. I found it a little weird, even though I had sample questions and knew what to expect. I just don’t know how they grade this section. The English expression section was very, very easy. I mean, I was almost laughing during it because it was so simple. Anyone who’s a native English speaker would breeze through it. The final portion was a timed essay. We were provided with a prompt – I know that there are different prompts out there, so the topics vary – and you have to write a persuasive essay, arguing your position one way or another, in 30 minutes. I had done some practice essays to see how fast I could write and I felt pretty confident that I could get it done in 30 minutes. I did finish just in time and didn’t have time to review, but I think I did well enough to get a passing score, which is all I need.

My thought about this whole process now that it’s over – first of all, I’m relieved! No more studying, and my life can get back to normal. By that I mean I can stop making excuses to not clean my house. Last weekend, I pretty much sequestered myself to the house and studied all day long, both days. Ugh. I’m happy to regain my free time. I also feel that if it’s meant to be, I will pass, and that if I don’t, that means I don’t have the knowledge, experience, or qualities they are looking for. Fortunately I have a number of other interests that I can and will pursue. All I know for sure is that I have to take action to change my current employment situation because I don’t know how much longer I can bear it.

Cash Log

I was reading a blog this afternoon that features money-saving tips. One entry was particularly interesting, it was the "money diary" of a 25-year-old woman. For a number of days, she wrote about what she spent her money on. Mostly, she felt guilty about spending money she didn't have - she was buying a lot of things with her credit card. I've been thinking a lot lately - worrying a lot, actually - about money and the need to spend less because of what I see as an unstable employment future. I thought I'd give the money diary a shot. Here goes:

Friday, June 12: Today was payday. Normally this would be exciting, because it appears that I have a fairly significant amount of money in my checking account. The reality is that I have to stash about half of my paycheck away so that I can make the mortgage payment on July 1. Also, my student loan payment cleared today. That's another big chunk. I made an online payment for my credit card, and that should clear tomorrow. I did deposit my travel reimbursement check today, which covers the credit card and then some, so that is reassuring.

I mostly spent money on little things today. I bought a couple pieces of candy at See's. I think I spent about $1.45 there. I stopped at Safeway on my way home and spent about $14 on groceries, some stuff for dinner and some fruit. I decided to stay home tonight because I wanted to relax after a stressful week. I did treat myself to a movie at Blockbuster, which set me back $4.88. I bought some candy for $0.88. And I think that's about it.

Lately I've been leaving my wallet at home when I go to work, so I won't be tempted to go buy stuff. This is mostly to prevent me from buying cookies or other unnecessary food during the day - like the See's candy today! It works pretty well and I can kill two birds with one stone - save money and save calories.

Taken

The Boytoy and I made plans to see each other on Thursday night. He called me the night before, at 10:30 pm. I was surprised to hear from him. He wanted to share with me that he'd received a job offer. He was really excited about it. I thought it was kind of adorable that he wanted to call me that night with the info, considering I'd be seeing him the next day. He also wanted to ask me if it'd be OK if he stopped by the office to see me. I said sure, I'd be in all afternoon. He had a lunch meeting in downtown.


He came by the office at about 4:30 pm and hung out in the reception area, chatting with my work friend and me for about 15 minutes. He got ready to leave and I wanted to talk with him about our plans for later, but couldn't do so there. He said he was going to get a beer with some people we used to work with. I knew he had a b-ball game at 7:30 (he asked me to come watch) but I didn't know if he was meeting me before and/or after the game. I was somewhat irritated because I really need to have my time planned and scheduled. What can I say, I'm a busy girl! If we weren't going to hang out after work, then I would have time to get my nails done. We exchanged a couple of text messages and I told him I wouldn't have time to go to his game, but I confirmed he was coming to my place after. He told me he'd like to watch a move and I said I'd rent one. I went to Safeway after my nail appointment and got a movie (Taken) and I bought a frozen pizza for him. He didn't come over until a little after 9:00 pm. I was relaxing, watching the season finale of Grey's Anatomy. He took a shower and I cooked his pizza. I started the movie. We watched about 3/4 of the movie before I leaned over and gave him a kiss. The kiss kept going and I suggested we pause the movie. He didn't protest.

We went upstairs - no need to share details, but I would like to say that I was very impressed and I had a great time. He was still in my bed when I left for work. I told him he could hang out and that the front door was locked, so he could leave whenever. He still isn't allowed to drive. I didn't bother asking how he was going to get home, I figured he had a friend or family member to call for a ride. He had plans to play golf at 3 p.m. He's got it pretty good for an unemployed guy.

I am fairly certain that we'll see each other again, I don't see why not. So far, everything's going according to my plan (of what I want, that is).

What's a Colorado Dingo, Anyway?

My most recent ex-boyfriend is on Match.com. I know this because one of my friends informed me that her friend saw a photo of her on some guy's profile on Match. She asked me to guess whose profile it could possibly be - she told me the screen name was "coloradodingo". I had no idea. Well, it turns out to be Rob. And who else is in the photo with Rob and my friend? ME. I was first a bit amused, then shocked, then downright mad that he would use images of me and my friends in his efforts to meet ladies online. That is just wrong. My friend said maybe he was trying to make it seem like he has friends (he doesn't). I was definitely prepared to contact him and politely ask him to please remove any and all images of me and my friends from his online dating page. Luckily I didn't have to - when I got home and viewed his page, those photos weren't there. Maybe he thought about it and decided it wasn't such a good idea after all.

So of course I checked out his profile. He had 4 photos posted - two of which were taken by me in Lake Tahoe last September. The other two were of him and his Harley. Nice. It's kind of funny because I had remarked to myself and others that I didn't think Rob would have much success with online dating, if he were to try it, because the guy is just not photogenic. I mean, he's very attractive in person, but it was impossible to get a good photo of him. I have one - in three-plus months of dating - that turned out really nicely. My sense of this was proven true in the four pics he chose - they don't do him justice. He's also wearing shades in every photo.

Then there's his written profile. I knew he wasn't a gifted writer from the e-mails we'd exchanged. But the poor grammar and bad sentence structure in his profile made me cringe. OK, so I'm a grammar Nazi and this kind of stuff is important to me. But still. The content was also unimpressive. Essentially, if I hadn't known the guy and was just reading his profile, perusing through guys I might be interested in meeting, I'd never in a million years want to contact him based on his Match profile. Kinda sad, considering the huge amount of time I spent with the guy. Oh well. I had fun and now I've (we've) moved on.

I do think it's a little funny, though, that now I'm "spending time" with the Boytoy, who Rob met several times. Back then, I never would have thought that would happen. Naturally I fantasized about it...often...but not when I was with Rob (honest!).

Moral of the story - it's not OK to post photos of your ex (and/or their friends) on your online dating page. Oh, and guys? Maybe have someone read your written profile to check for errors before you post it.

Food I Eat

Thursday, May 7, 2009
1. chocolate croissant from La Bou (evil but delicious)
2. English breakfast tea (good)
3. pink grapefruit (good but sugary)
4. breaded chicken breast (not great b/c of breading)
5. rice pilaf (neutral)
6. carrots (good)
7. broccoli (good)
8. bread roll w/butter (I eat way too many carbs)
9. iced tea (fine)
10. carrot cake (evil, needless to say)
11. half cup of coffee with cream
12. Fiber One bar (good)
13. black bean Morningstar Farms brand veggie burger (good)
14. english muffin (bun for burger) - fine
15. romaine salad with broccoli, cannelini beans, cucumber, carrots and olive oil/balsamic vinegar for dressing (good)
16. mint chip ice cream (evil)

I think a small village in Africa could survive for a week on the food I ate in one day! Yikes. Must do better tomorrow.

The Overnight Guest

Last Thursday I met some friends for a glass of wine after work and got home at about 9:30 p.m. I had a missed call from the Boytoy so I gave him a buzz. He'd had a court date that morning and wanted to tell me what happened. We chatted briefly and then he asked me if he could come over and crash on my couch because he had a meeting in downtown the next morning. I was a bit surprised but said sure! Come on over. Since he lives a half hour away, I figured I had plenty of time to tidy up the house and change out of my work suit. But no, the doorbell rang 5 minutes later! Sure enough, there he was - looking a bit sheepish. He said "I know this seems creepy - sorry." He'd been playing basketball only a few minutes away from my house and had his friend drop me off. He said he had been planning to stay at his friend's, but that his friend's girlfriend was mourning a death in the family and it was bad timing. Hmmm.

He took a shower - he had just played b-ball, after all. In that time, I went into my room and threw a bunch of crap into the closet and changed out of my work clothes. I went downstairs to relax on the couch. He joined me when he finished his shower. We talked for a while and things were getting a little flirtatious. Eventually we went upstairs to my room. He tried to sleep on the couch but I wouldn't allow it. My bed is so much more comfortable! I was just being a good hostess. Anyway...we hung out in my room for a while, and then he was falling asleep and it turns out he snores SO loudly! I couldn't handle it so I grabbed a pillow and headed downstairs. I'm not sure I've ever slept on my own couch. It wasn't that comfy, but I am sure I got more sleep than I would have if I'd stayed in my room.

In the morning I snuck into my room, and into my bed. He was cuddly, it was cute. I got ready for work and he got dressed. We left the house together and took light rail into downtown. How romantic...oh yeah. He walked me into my office building and gave me a hug goodbye.

Moral of the story? I love being single...having a hot 25 year old guy come over and spend the night in the middle of the week, totally unexpectedly. Even if it meant I couldn't sleep in my own bed. Good enough that I knew there was a gorgeous naked guy in my bed. Life is good.

Oh - he somehow knows I have a blog and he was asking me if I was going to write about him. I assured him that I'd change his name and that no, he could NOT have the URL :)

Number 100

When I was much younger, my friend and I wrote lists of the guys we'd kissed. Over the years, our lists both grew, but I could never hope to catch up with her. Until she met The One at age 24 and her list stopped. Yes! Victory was mine. In a surprising show of continuity, I've actually kept the list going. It's kind of fun to look back and see, for example, that I kissed 14 guys in 1993 (I'm estimating). Naturally, my numbers dwindled in the post-college years. There have been some long, long dry spells over the years, believe me. Sometimes, when I write down a new name, I sort of wonder "could this be the last guy on my list?"

I'm somewhat proud to announce that I broke the 3-digit barrier on Sunday night. I had plans with the Boytoy to hang out in his neck of the woods. I headed down to the Delta and arrived at his house (after getting lost) a little after 4 p.m. I brought my bike with me. It was super hot (for mid-April). He was nowhere to be found. I was somewhat dismayed that his sister was home, I was hoping to spend some alone time with him. But whatever. She said he was putting away the lawnmower. He came back and we got ready to head out on our bikes and meet up with his friends on the river. His friend has a pretty sweet boat and there were 6 or 7 people on the boat. I had never met any of them. One of the guys, who BT had also never met, asked me if we were engaged. Yikes! I laughed and said, no, we're friends. Funny.

We cruised around on the river for a while (a while too long for my taste) and BT showed off his wakeboarding skills (not bad, but a little shaky). He has a tattoo of his last name written in cursive across his left breast. His friends teased him...I'm sure he gets that a lot. We finally got off the boat at around 8 pm and we dropped off a couple of his friends because one of them had borrowed his truck. Then we stopped by to pick up our bikes. We went back to his house and started dinner. He barbecued a striped bass, that he had caught (just for me!) the day before. He also grilled asparagus and some potatoes. He opened a bottle of Zin (my favorite - and his, as well) and had classic rock playing through the satellite system. We finally sat down to eat at about 9:30 pm. Fabulous meal, good conversation. What more could I want? Oh - just to make out with the young hottie, that's all.

It was almost midnight (where did the time go??) and I said I should head out. I put my stuff together and he walked me outside. He got my bike from his truck and disassembled it and put it in the backseat of my car. It was gorgeous outside. It's completely dark and really, really quiet. The only sounds were crickets and frogs, and I could see tons of stars. His animals were hanging around - 3 dogs and 2 cats. One of the dogs, a Great Dane, was trying to chase one of the cats and that wasn't going over too well. BT had to discipline the dog and try to get another dog to quit barking. Comedy.

He gave me a hug goodbye and thanked me for coming over. I was a little disappointed - just a hug? Oh well. At least that was a sign that he only thought of me as a friend. No prob. But we kept talking, and we were both leaning against my car, next to each other. I moved over just a tad and was kind of touching his arm area with mine. Then he moved closed to me, and while we were talking, put his arm around me. He was sort of rubbing my side - nice. I hugged him again, and sort of lingered in the hug. He is pretty tall, so I had to make an effort to have my face anywhere near his. I pretty much gave him the opportunity to kiss me, which he did - thank goodness. I was standing as high on my tippy-toes as possible in order to keep kissing him - I was afraid I was going to lose my balance and fall over! The kissing was very nice - soft and sensual. Oh my. Serious chemistry. Uh oh. This continued for a little while - I dunno, a minute or two? Hard to estimate. Then I left...he said something like he would talk to me or see me soon. God I hope so. I had a huge smile on my face as I was driving home - totally giddy.

We e-mailed on Monday and I thanked him for dinner. I said I had a great time, and told him I would return the favor. He wrote back and said "glad I wasn't the only one" with regard to having a great time. I took that as positive. He called me this afternoon, I was at work and my phone was on mute. He left a message. I was ridiculously excited that he called. In his message, he said "hey pretty lady...". How cute. Of course, to him I am a lady. A "ma'am". Oh no! When we were eating dinner he asked me how old I was. He never knew...good thing he doesn't seem to mind.

I called him back tonight and we talked for about half an hour. Good stuff. No future plans were made, but I'm not worried about it. It'll happen. As for number 101? Yeah, that'll happen too.