Shock

I just heard that one of my friends died last night. He is not someone I consider a close friend. Regardless, he is someone I've known and hung out with socially for many years. I hadn't seen him for a while and was just asking our mutual friend about him on Friday night. She hadn't seen him for some time, either. It turns out he had a girlfriend, which explains why he was MIA. He and the girlfriend were at his house and got into a fight, which escalated and he pushed her down the stairs - or she fell, I don't know. Later that night, he was drunk - I think she was gone by then - and he got out his gun and shot himself. And he died. I guess I never really knew him. He was 39 years old, I think. Maybe 40. He was a very successful guy by all measures. He had a bachelor's and a master's degree. He had a great career doing business strategy at Intel in Folsom. He had a beautiful, immaculately decorated home next to a lake in a nice neighborhood. For a short while, I lived near him and I would see him running on the levy bike path. He always drove the nicest cars and dressed well. I went out with one of his good friends a few times, he told me that R. always wanted to date the most beautiful girls because those were the types of women he wanted to be seen with. Outward appearances were very important to him. A few of us joked around that he was gay because he was sort of a "metrosexual" type of guy. It seems (seems being the key word, I suppose) like he had everything going for him. I don't get it. I don't understand why he wanted to end it all. Maybe I'll learn more later, but in the meantime, it's hard to know how I feel because this wasn't an accident, he did this to himself on purpose. I can't imagine how his parents, his other family members are feeling.