Tired of Texting

One of the (many) problems with dating - or trying to date - younger men is that they prefer to communicate via text messaging. Or maybe it's not age-related, I don't know. But most of the guys I get involved with "talk" to me via text and sometimes (if I'm lucky) via e-mail.

Take G., for example. He's 28 and I don't think he knows how old I am. It hasn't come up in conversation, but I'm sure he knows I'm older. If I don't step in and call him, or specifically request that he call me, our conversations would be 100% text. Not OK. I don't mind using text messaging in some instances, but you can't have an actual conversation. Then again, this guy has other issues. For example, we went out last Friday and he dropped me off at home. He asked me if he could stay over because he was too tired to drive home. I said yes but felt it was somewhat awkward, since we hadn't even kissed or exchanged any sort of affectionate moments. He said he wanted to sleep in my bed with me. And that's what he did. No good night kiss, nothing. He offered to cuddle if I got cold. Huh. I was really confused. Then he wanted to go to breakfast in the morning. I continued to be confused. I'm supposed to see him in a couple of days, but only because I invited him to meet me somewhere, and because we had a phone conversation requested by me. At least he can follow instructions, and he called me when I asked him to.

The day before my boss's election, I got a mysterious text message from a (619) number - that's San Diego. It said "good luck tomorrow!" I had no idea who it was from and I don't have many friends in SD. I forgot about it until Wednesday, when I received another message from the same number saying "congrats". Finally I replied and said "thanks, who is this?" And got a message back saying "Lovell. Ha." That's this guy, J., who I met in August at a friend's birthday party. We went out once and had a great time. We drank two bottles of wine and made out for a few minutes. We exchanged a couple of text messages (of course) the following week, and then all communication ceased because I never heard back from him. Another one of those dating mysteries. Oh well. I pretty much forgot about it. This one is only 26, by the way. So I wrote him back "I wondered what happened to you" and he said "Tell me about it. I was in trial for 5 weeks." He is an attorney. O-K. Still annoyed. I wrote him back today (why?? I don't know) and said "let me know if you want to get together again sometime" and what response did I get? None. Figures.

The third guy is N., in San Francisco. He doesn't really call me either, but he'll respond to my e-mails very quickly. I saw him two weeks ago and thought things went extremely well, but I haven't heard from him since. Wonder if I have to e-mail him? Ugh. It's so much work, for so little in return.

Finally - my crush. I know, I have many. But really, this is the guy I've been crazy about for more than two years, ever since I first saw him in July 2007. I saw him at the trade show in Anaheim and I'm still in love. He doesn't have a clue, as far as I know. I invited him to our party but he didn't show. However, he had sent me an e-mail asking me if I was still at the party, knowing I would get it on my Blackberry. But I didn't get it, I left the phone in my hotel room. Grr. I didn't write back. He sent me another message the next morning, asking how the party was and saying he was sorry he couldn't make it. I wrote him back a few days later and said I was going to be in SF next week, and did he want to meet for happy hour? He does. Yessss. I'm making plans to head over there next Tuesday and we are all set to meet at 6 pm at some bar in the Fin Dist. I am ridiculously excited. I have liked him for so long. Maybe, just maybe, he likes me too? Given my luck, totally unlikely. But still I try.

Guys, please - call a woman if you want to talk to her. Stop sending text messages!